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I need to make a decision, but I'm scared to do so. It's a decision that will change a lot of things in my life right now and futre things that I look forward to. I'm really not sure what to do in this situationn. It's one of those decisions that "grown-ups" make, and of course, I don't feel like a grown up yet. I don't feel like I can make a decision like this and realize the impact that will be revealed in the future to come.

All I want is a home to call my own. Isn't that what everyone wants? Indianapolis is the closest I've ever felt to having an attainable home. Germany has and will always be my hometown, but I don't see myself living there anymore. Not like I used to dream. I think I've fianally let go and realized that my hometown should stay what it is, the place I grew up, not the place I will grow old.

Something inside me is settling. I'm tired of searching for home. I like it here. I feel like I'm home. I've not felt like this before, to my knowledge. It's a great feeling, but it still comes with hard decisions.

My life recently has been full of uncertainty, and that's the only thing I can be sure of.